"In Shifting Era of Admissions, Colleges Sweat"--The Times
DARTMOUTH COLLEGE: Good morning, I'm calling on behalf of Dartmouth for Jason Goodwin.
JASON GOODWIN: This is him.
DC: Hello, this is President Rogers. It's come to our attention you're interested in joining our community. If you have a few minutes, I'd like to conduct an informal interview.
JG: You're President of the Admissions Office?
DC: President of the College, actually. Tell me, Jason, what makes you click?
JG: Snobby people, people who channel surf, people who screen their calls, stores that won't tell you how much electronic stuff costs over the phone....
DC: (Dubious) All this makes you click?
JG: I thought you said "sick."
DC: How about heroes?
JG: Why would heroes make me sick? Do you mean like hoagies?
DC: Tell me about your personal heroes.
JG: Action figures? That I actually own?
DC: You're stranded on a desert island with three books. Which three?
JG: How am I supposed to know?
DC: Choose three.
JG: I'm more of a visual person.
DC: I see. Perhaps you've heard of our renowned Hopkins Art Center.
JG: Shouldn't that be at Hopkins?
DC: This one's at Dartmouth. Say you're asked to contribute half a dozen items to a time capsule. What do you share?
JG: I'm not really comfortable with that question.
DC: All right, let's move on. Do you play any sports?
JG: No.
DC: Hobbies?
JG: Aren't they the same as sports? What temperature is it there now?
DC: We're in the midst of Winter Carnival. What a grand time: ice sculptures, bonfires....
JG: Cold, huh?
DC: About sixteen degrees. Jason, it's wonderful getting to know you. Do you have any questions for me?
JG: What's a time capsule?
DC: Well...
JG: (Interrupting) Would I have my own computer at Dartmouth?
DC: Absolutely.
JG: How about cable?
DC: We could explore that. In conclusion, how would you describe yourself?
JG: I'm right-handed.
DC: Really? So am I. What else?
JG: I like pizza. The crispy kind. Not deep-dish.
DC: We have plenty of pizza. And beer. Now if one of your parents is available....
JG: Hold on.
PG: Hello, this is Philip Goodwin.
DC: Good morning, Mr. Goodwin. This is President Harold Rogers of Dartmouth. I understand from the preliminary query you sent in that you won't be requesting financial aid.
PG: No.
DC: Congratulations.
PG: Thank you.
DC: And congratulations on your son's acceptance to Dartmouth College.
PG: This is very sudden. We haven't submitted his transcript, test scores, or teacher recommendations yet.
DC: Some may call us old-fashioned, but we take a more personal approach. After our phone interview, I feel Jason and Dartmouth are a perfect fit.
PG: Still....
DC: Let's call it Early Decision.
PG: He hasn't even applied.
DC: Binding early decision. I would need a commitment now.
PG: Excuse me?
DC: Are you familiar with our "Stay four years for the price of three" offer? Jason can enjoy a free year in bucolic Hanover if you simply pay the first three years' tuition today.
PG: I can't make that sort of promise. And I should tell you: Jason's looking at other colleges.
DC: Who's on your short list?
PG: Princeton and Amherst.
DC: Amherst is now a subsidiary of Princeton. There was an auction last week. The U.S. government owns 36% of Amherst and Princeton owns the rest.
PG: Does Dartmouth own any colleges?
DC: Bowdoin, half of Haverford, and 15% of N.Y.U.'s program in Abu Dhabi. We also have a number of private equity holdings, real estate partnerships, hedge funds, commodities, venture capital stakes and other alternative investments available for immediate sale at very attractive prices.
PG: I should be going.
DC: Princeton and Amherst are pretty tough to get into.
PG: Not anymore: Princeton calls during dinner.
DC: Work with me. If you can FedEx us a cashier's check for $11,000 this morning, I can guarantee your son a corner room overlooking the Green next fall.
PG: Jason's doing an eco-service project in Costa Rica this August. When do classes start?
DC: When can he get here?
