It's not often your name is nearly identical to someone else's (particularly that of a moderately famous Australian movie star), but such is the case with me and Eric Bana. If he had a "g" added to his surname and the letters were then rearranged, he would have the privilege of being Eric Bagan.
The similarity doesn't end there. While watching "Troy," I noticed Bana (Hector) was standing next to Brad Pitt (Achilles) and asked my wife which of the two actors I most resemble. Her response was immediate: "Eric Bana."
In fact, I'm tall (5'9"), have brown eyes, and the sort of rugged yet androgynous features which have served me well in poetry workshops. I possess changeable looks and my hair often stands on end. For all I know, Eric Bana shares these qualities, but since I've only ever seen him on screen, I can't be sure.
I do know we are capable of attaining the same soulful look in our eyes, though mine are hazel (or actually the color of sea glass in muted light) and his are chocolate brown. Though neither of us yet has the reputation of a Tom Cruise or Will Smith, he and I are each rising stars in our fields (acting and educational administration, respectively).
Regrettably, I haven't seen Bana in some of his best-known movies. I passed on "Hulk" (I don't like the color green), "Star Trek" (don't like aviation), and "Black Hawk Down" (don't like the color black or aviation). But I admired his performance in "Munich," in which he tracked down and killed Black September terrorists (true, I dislike black, but do like September).
We also have "Troy" in common (he was in it; I saw it (twice)). He fought Achilles just the way I would have, though I might have relied a little less on my shield and employed more swordplay and head feints (war is based on deception).
Other coincidences: Bana has two children, a boy and a girl. I also have a son and--wait for it--a daughter! His son was born in July, as was mine. Both our daughters have six letters in their first names. But here's where it gets really spooky: Bana's son is named Klaus. My daughter is named Barbie. Who was the Butcher of Lyon? Klaus Barbie. Which ethnic group is not overly fond of Nazis? And when he starred in "Munich" as an Israeli Mossad agent named Avner, which ethnicity was Eric Bana portraying? So we each have experience playing Jews and killing terrorists with our bare hands (if, in my case, you count mosquitoes as terrorists).
The uncanny parallels mount: Eric Bana and I each appear to be less than stellar drivers. A motor racing enthusiast, he crashed his 1974 XB Ford Falcon coupé in the Targa Tasmania rally. A riding mower enthusiast, I decapitated a squirrel on a Snapper 2812523BVE at my weekend home in Pennsylvania.
Like many movie stars, Eric's sexual orientation is open to interpretation (I'm straight), and I'm unaware of his educational background (I made honor roll three semesters in high school and scored a "4" on the American history A.P. exam), or interests (reading and power walking are mine). But I do know that we're both "built." I attract my share of stares at the gym (my wife says it's because of the low weight I bench press ) and a girlfriend at summer camp once told me I had a washboard stomach (though she was breaking up with me when she said it).
I did enjoy watching Eric have sex in "Munich." He seemed attentive and like he could go the distance (I can also. Usually.) However, he made love to his wife when she was seven months' pregnant, which is something I would never do (to my wife, his, or anyone's) as I believe it can endanger the baby.
Probably the most difficult aspect of having a full name so close to a movie star's is determining how much of what we know about each other is based on a "public persona." At parties, I'll frequently clear a space of furniture and area rugs and entertain others with a sort of stand-up/ karaoke/ ghost story routine. My face is usually florid (I drink gin with anything) and I'm "on" for up to forty minutes, but it's not really me. It's a facet of myself (my wife asks why she didn't see this facet when we were dating; I had to save some good stuff, babe), but not my complete identity.
And I imagine that's how it is for Eric Bana. He's on the red carpet talking in a big, broad Australian accent with "Entertainment Tonight," and then everyone goes into the premiere and he's on screen speaking like an American. It's not that Americans sound great (though we definitely do compared to the Israelis in "Munich"), but I'd rather sound like an American (even one from New York), than an Australian.
Obviously, there are differences: Eric Bana's Wikipedia entry is longer than mine, he's younger (40 to my 47), he wasn't fired unfairly by a govermental agency with no justification whatsoever, and I'm not married to the daughter of the Chief Justice of Australia.
On the other hand, his in-laws probably aren't taking him on an all-expenses-paid cruise through Alaskan waterways this summer which will feature glaciers, trained naturalists, and fine wines. Nor has his one-bedroom on First Avenue tripled in value since he bought it (even factoring in the recent dip in the real estate market). On balance, we're both probably pretty well-adjusted guys who find women have a hard time getting past our looks to realize we're men of substance. I wonder if his middle name is Charles.
